Waiting for test results a yearly chore

May comes around the same time every year. For me it was like tests are easy. Very easy really. But it's the waiting for those results that is awful. Deep down you know or hope it will be ok. But there is that little thing that crops up in your mind after you have been through Cancer or any disease. Am I ok??
Twice in 19 years I had the dreaded you need to come back in phone call there is a area of concern. Well waiting overnight is the hardest thing. You know it's ok. But as human beings it's pretty tough. Our mind of course goes into survival mode. What if I get bad news.
Ok so before mobile phones. I get home 6 pm. My eldest son says at dinner, Mum the doctor rang you need go see him. Omg! The last thing the doctor said was I will only contact you if something's wrong. I get that feeling..,, I think you all know the one..,,HELP...
The next morning drop the children at school 8.40 am at Terrigal beach NSW Australia by 9 am. Doctor can't see me till 10.30 am an hour and half goes so quickly. Except if your waiting. You know those noisey clocks, the one that go tick tock tick tock!!! Yep noisey as in your head waiting for the minutes to pass.
Get there and it's about my cholesterol being too high.
I silently laugh, well not really but it's a relief. Even though that's bad it's heaps better than Cancer is back.
The mind is the devils play ground. I thought nothing scared me ever!!! Just found out I am human..,eeeekkkk
#scared #results #remission #cancer

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